Friday, December 31, 2010

Stalkers and Psychos

There's been so much talk lately about stalkers.
You know me.  I gotta put my 2 cents in.

Chances are if you know me or have read my blog long you know exaaaaaaaaactly how I feel about stalking.  Yeah, that'd be why my blog was down for so long.  AKA, I think it's douchetastic and just a teensy beyond creepy.

Lets start by being technical:

The National Center for Victims of Crime states:
While legal definitions of stalking vary from one jurisdiction to another, a good working definition of stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear.

Stalking is serious, often violent, and can escalate over time.
Check the statistics:
3.4 million people over the age of 18 are stalked in the US every year
3 out of 4 victims are stalked by someone they know
30% are stalked by a current or former intimate partner (sometimes via 3rd party-aka, a psycho stalks their ex's new girlfriend as a way to stalk the ex)
Only 10% of victims are stalked by strangers
Persons age 18-24 have the highest rate of stalking
11% of stalking victims have been stalked for 5 years or more (yeah, I'm getting close to being part of that statistic)
46% of stalking victims experience at least one unwanted contact per week (thank God for orders of protection...look into them people!)
1 in 4 victims report being stalked through technology such as the internet/email/instant messaging/social media sites
2 out of 3 stalkers pursue their victims at least once a week, many daily, and usually via more than one method
78% of stalkers use more than one approach
In 1 out of 5 cases, weapons are used to threaten or harm victims
Almost 1/3 of stalkers have been stalked themselves (yea, that doesn't justify it, whackos!)
Intimate partner stalkers approach their victims frequently and their behavior escalates quickly

Stalking is a crime in all 50 states and all US territories.  End of story.

So what sparked the sudden post about stalking?  Well, to be quite honest, there are WAY too many people that I know dealing with this sort of thing right now and it's crossed well into the concerning category, so I figured a little educating on stalking and a little poking fun at how freakishly crazy you have to be do it might serve to both lighten the mood and help keep people safe.

I belong to a plethora of online sites though, admittedly, I just killed my Myspace account today.  No point to having an account I never log into.  I have a list of other sites who's accounts will soon be going the way of the dodo bird as well.  Love em and leave em was not what I had in mind when I set up accounts on most sites but as my own personal romp with a stalkerific stalker progressed and more and more sites of mine were somehow being dragged out of the dark cobwebby corners of the internet, one by one I stopped using places like Myspace, Cafemom, and even my beloved  I'm a big advocate of never letting anyone silence you, but sometimes you have to ehhhhh not necessarily bite your tongue but definitely disguise your tongue to keep those you love safe.  With stalkers, yup...that's frequently the case.

Stalking in my case was well...lets just say that people with too much time on their hands will find ways to find things out about you if you're the center of their obsession.  In my case, I'm pretty sure that if I stalker knew about it.  Probably still does, but the Stalkess keeps to herself a bit more than previously.

One of my friends recently found out that she's being stalked online...get her daycare provider!  Hmmm...where to start.  #1-Eww to like the 12th power.  #2-she's being paid to watch people's kids...but is spending her time tracking shit down line...shame shame shame!  #3-PEOPLE, STOP BEING SO PSYCHO!

A note to stalkers:  It's not socially acceptable no matter what you try to tell yourself!  What a person does is their business, if they choose to make it public, like the stuff I blog about, then fine, read it.  If someone has an anonymous account on a website that prides itself on keeping it's members info closed, and you stalk them out by some photo or screen name...REEE REEE REEE (yeah that was the sound from the shower scene of Psycho) you've got some serious shit to deal with.

I can't imagine the horror that my friend had to have had inside when her babysitter confronted her about having said something online regarding her babysitting arrangement.  My little man doesn't go to daycare, he doesn't spend time being babysat by anyone I don't know very very well...I mean grandparents, aunts, uncles, that's it...I would trust a couple of my closest friends  but haven't needed to call them in for sitting just yet.  The idea of leaving my kid with someone I barely know, well, fuck that.  But then to have something like that happen would give me the heeby jeebies every time I thought about what my child had been doing during the sitters online fun time...and to put it lightly-it'd be time for a new daycare provider.


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